Moscow or SoCal?

Man: did you hear the other day that the wildfires are so out of control around Moscow?

Woman: I think I heard something about that on the news, it's really sad. People are dying.

Man: Yeah, I mean, these people don't even have air conditioners - never needed them. And they're stuck inside their homes and they can't open the window because the air's so stiff.

Woman: That is so sad.

Man: What's really sad, now, get this - the news said that the officials stated that they're losing about 780 people a week,

but get this:

they said it was unusual, because they usually only lose about 400 this time of year.

Woman: What?

Man: That's right. They usually only lose about 400 - to the smog. Now, doesn't there seem to be something wrong with this picture?

Overheard at Booth Two

Overheard at Table Three

I heard a great saying today, it goes something like:

When a person is young, they think they can change the world.

When a person is middle aged, they know they can only change themselves.

When a person is old, they no longer care!

At the Counter

John Steppenwolf showing Niall Carter the lastest joke he found on treehugger.com

"Look!" he says, "Music piracy helps stop global warming!"

"Reminds me of all the jokes whenever we got those cold ice snaps last winter, all the dinks saying 'Thought it was s'posed to be global WARMING' huh huh huh!" Niall says morosely.

The Barista says, "Well, they're not laughing now - not with this heat wave blasting across 18 states!"

Steppenwolf says, "That's for sure."

Niall pulls up on his Blackberry one that he found the other day - "Look," he says, "this one is a swimming pool, but look at what's at the bottom of the swimming pool.

MM! Progress!!!

"I swear," Niall says, "Someday in the future when we've totally [EXPLETIVE DELETED] this planet, some aliens are going to sift through the scaps and realize, 'Hey! These dumb [EXPLETIVE DELETED] sat around and made jokes while the world

burned!"

After a few moments, John Steppenwolf says,

"We are Nero."

Overheard at Table 5

Ezekiel Mueller telling his fiance, Nicole Rathsmussin, over a double latte and a honeyberry scone,

"Listen, I think everybody is just whacked out of their mind if they don't look at pictures of the repairs on the space station and just realize that THAT is just the coolest job in the world!"

"Actually," his future wife corrects him gently, patting his hand, "it's really OUT of this world!"

Overheard at Booth One

- I heard today that the House tried to pass a bill to pay out a billion dollars to cover the health care costs of the police and firefighters who got sick after working ground zero on 911.

- Did it pass?

- Nope. Republicans killed it. Said it was a waste of money. Said these guys were freeloaders wanting to sponge off the system from cradle to grave.

- Uh, isn't that a little hypocritical? I mean, these the same guys who've been living off the memory of 911 for the last ten years? Using it to subsidize their wars and bank profiteering?

- Same guys.

- Hm. And we keep reelecting them?

- Somebody does, apparently.

Overheard at Table Four

heard someone say on the radio that their mother put it this way:

The time to deport someone is BEFORE they've spent twenty years cleaning your house, preparing your food, replacing your roof, and raising your kids, not AFTER.