Tuesday, August 30, 2016

Overheard at Table 4: IDK

Dad: What does IDK mean

Son: I don't know.

Dad: Well then who would?

Son: That's what it means, Dad, IDK.  I. Don't. Know.

Dad: See, now was that so hard?

Son: Geez Dad, WTF

Dad: What does that mean?

Son: Nevermind.

Dad: Well WTF to you too then!

Monday, August 29, 2016

Overheard at Booth 4: Etymology of GUERO

Hispanic guy:  You know why we call all you white guys "Gueros"?

White guy: I dunno.  Why?

Hispanic guy: Because you're always coming down to our countries saying, "GUERO all the Latinas at?"

Sunday, August 28, 2016

Overheard at Table 2: If I Were a Trump Supporter

I actually read on Twitter the other day some Trump supporter tweet "I really believe he cares."

I couldn't believe that.  The lunacy of those five words is now burned into my brain.  There is nothing that says that he cares.  I mean, the man takes a human tragedy like the murder of 50 people in a gay nightclub and states "Thanks to all the people who now know that I was right" - and just the other day he tweeted "woman gets killed walking her baby.  African Americans will vote TRUMP!" I mean what the HELL.  Any reasonable mind understands that he's only in this for himself.

If I were Trump supporter, I wouldn't have any illusions that he's in this for the American people.  He's in this for his brand and for his brand and to improve his cash flow.  I'd support him because I would believe that he wouldn't want to do anything to stop his cash flow, and if the country's economy were tied to it, then he would work to defend it.

I'd also support him because he hates the TPP and wants to support tariffs.  I'd let people know that's going to raise the price of shit through the roof.  I mean, there won't be no more Wal-Mart markdowns.  T-shirts would be $20 instead of $5, but we all have to make sacrifices, right?

I'd also support him because he's able to mobilize the disenfranchised.  Those people who never voted before came out in droves in the primaries and blasted the shit out of the Republican Party.  I mean, this guy has shredded the Republican party more than any Democrat could ever do.  They'd been trying to fight these guys for a decades, and Trump does it in just a few short months.

So that would be why I'd support him.  But I would never, ever, EVER in my life delude myself into thinking he actually CARED about America or its people.  Because he doesn't.  And he never will.

Thursday, August 25, 2016

Overheard at the Counter: Gardening and Music (a Playlist)

My dear friends, yesterday a Trump Troll, rather than attempting to discuss important civic matters in a rational debate, simply told my friend PK and I to "go back to our gardening and music"

How she knows I garden I have no idea, because I do not garden.   Attempted many times, but the Associated for Decent Treatment to Flora sent me a letter begging me never to touch one of our green-leaved friends again.  Apparently the Chrysanthemums accused me of abuse, the Pansies said I engage in hate crimes, and the Avacado trees tried to drag me before the World Court to be held accountable for genocide.  Suffice it to say, gardening is not my forte.

However, the Trump Troll did inspire me to cobble together a list of songs about gardening and music.  OK, songs that have "garden" in the title.   But here you go friends, get out your trowels, your top soil, your guitars bass & drums, and ENJOY!

ARTIST: The Various Artists
ALBUM TITLE: Go Back to Your Gardening and Music

Lawnmower Deth
"Lawnmowers for Heroes Comics for Zeroes"

"The Garden was Crowded and Outside"

The Dentists
"Strawberries are Growing in my Garden (and It's Wintertime)"

Einsturzende Neubauten
"The Garden"

John Denver
"The Garden"

This one goes out to CARRIBETH
The Beatles
"Octopus's Garden"
[no YouTube video available - DARN YOU YOUTUBE!!]

This one is dedicated with much love to HEALING MUSE
Tangerine Dream
"Zen Garden"

Merril Bainbridge
"Garden in my Room"

The Explosive
"Who Planted Thorns in Miss Alice's Garden"

"Gardening at Night"

Pink Floyd
"The Grand Vizier's Garden Party"

This last one has been my favourite for decades, and we will fade out the day with this...
Rick Nelson
"Garden Party"

Tuesday, August 23, 2016

Overread at Booth 2: Writing Promt 08-22 "I Will Endure"

From @writtenriver writing prompt for August 22, 2016
"I will endure"

Though laughter, tears,
decades stretched to shrinking years,
deepening wrinkles and fading fears,

are still



Overread at Table 1: A section from "Unintelligible Yelling"

From the forthcoming book, which will be finished after the much-dreaded November 2016 Presidential election is over:

The week of 08-20-2016 -

But on this day Trump seemed to get back on his feet, like a struggling newborn calf trying to talk.  Trump bravely courted the African American vote in a room full of white people.  He also bravely flew down to flooded Louisiana to bravely hand off boxes of Play-Doh from a truck so that Louisiana children could forget that they have no home, no clothes, no food, and no clean water.

Yes, his monstrous popularity seemed to soar.  The LA governor praised him for his help in getting the focus on the suffering of Louisianans, white people praised how Donald Trump bravely stated that he would win 95% of the African American vote, and no one seemed to even remember how he nearly dry humped his own daughter during the RNC.

Saturday, August 20, 2016

Overheard at Table 4: Suitcases Totally Lit

Wife: God, I was so embarrassed when we got to my brother's house.  Tami opened her suitcase and it just totally REEKED of pot.

Husband: Hm.

Wife: Don't start.

Husband: I didn't start anything.

Wife: I see your face.

Husband: My face is saying nothing.  My face is drinking my espresso.

Wife: Whatever.  I asked her did you bring anything with you you better not have brought anything with you.  And she said no she didn't and not to start getting on her case because she already lives on her own.  So she was right, I had no right to say anything on this trip.

Husband: Yes, you did.  You had every right.  You should have told her she's 19, and dope is still illegal in Texas.  If she wants to smoke pot she can move to Colorado or California or Oregon or wherever, but she'll still have to be 21 there anyway.

Wife: Well she doesn't live with us any more, because you got so mad.

Husband: She was smoking pot in our house!  Your 83 year old MOTHER told us right when we walked in the door from work.  What the hell did you expect me to do?  Give her a bong for Christmas?

Wife: She's out of the house OK?  God I hadn't talked to her in two weeks since then.  She came on this trip with me to help out my brother.  It was the first time we'd talked.   So just back off.

Husband: OK, fine.  Just glad she didn't blaze up in your brother's house.

Wife: Still, it was embarrassing.  So there's that.  Are you happy?  I was embarrassed, are you happy?

Husband: How in the hell could that make me happy?

Wife: Because you always like to be right.

Husband: What the hell is so wrong with wanting my daughter not to commit a crime in our house?

Wife: Maybe if she were your real daughter you would love her more.

Husband: Been in her life since she was three.  I think that's counts as pretty real.

Wife: It's almost real.  But not real enough.

Thursday, August 18, 2016

Overread at Booth 1: "Never Have a Clue"

MR, the Z&T's the poet-in-residence (residence, because we can never seem to kick him out of here!), sits at Booth 1, scribbling furiously while he listens to No Use for a Name's third album "Leche Con Carne!"

So, the lyrics that come forth from his frothing pen (as he takes only 5 minutes to pen them with aforementioned frothing pen) are meant to be set to an early 90s ska-punk rhythm:

Never Have a Clue

You really learn a lot about somebody
When you walk a mile in their shoes
You learn if they’ve got a thing for ska-punk
Or if they just listen to Delta blues

People cease to be a mystery
When you sleep a week in their house
Maybe they’ll be cool and let you crash
Or say “Who the hell are you now get out!”

You gotta get to know the people
Everyone who lives and works around you
But if you don’t ever want to shake their hand
That just means you’ll never have a clue

You’ll never know anyone around you
If you never take the time to say “HEY!
How you doing’ what’s your name?
Have you ever heard Candy Apple Grey?”

You really learn a lot about somebody
When you drill a peephole in their wall
Then you can watch them when they’re sleeping
To see if they snore a lot or not at all.

This song’s about emotional intelligence
Otherwise known as “EQ”
And if you don’t try to get some, well
That just means you’ll never have a clue
That just means you’ll never have a clue
That just means you’ll never have a clue.

MR 2016-0818

and yes, all you aficionados out there will know that at that particular moment, MR was listening to "Soulmate" <= great song, by the way.

Inspiration comes in many forms.   - Source unknown
Steal Like an Artist - Austin Kleon

Tuesday, August 16, 2016

Overheard at Table 3: We Know What You Mean

So he says he was talking about getting out to vote?  Is that what he says he was trying to say?   That's gah-gage, my friend, pure gah-bage. Lemme tellya somethin' - you got a grocer in Manhattan, 1950s, 60s, whatevah.  And he's minding his store, minding his business, and one day two goons come in to the store and they say, "Nice place you got heah.  Sure would be a shame if somethin' were to HAPPEN to it!"

Now, they never come out and SAY "We're going to set fire to your store if you don't pay us," but the grocer knows what they're sayin' and THEY know what they're sayin' and EVERYBODY know what they're sayin and when Donald Stinking Lyin Sack of Queens GAH-BAGE Trump says, "You Second Amendment people do something about it" we ALL know that he's ordering a hit on Hillary.

We know what he means.  We all know what he means.  For his little maggoty bootlickahs to act like "ooh that's not what he meant" well that's just a damn lie.

Saturday, August 6, 2016

Overheard at Table 4: What the Bleep Do We Know (2004)

Lucky Moran: Pretty cool movie, apart from being total bullshit.

Otis Redwing: I dunno.  The part with the kid on the basketball court was pretty cool.