Friday, January 26, 2018
Tuesday, January 23, 2018
Mother: ... and another thing about you guys always being around is that your father and I don't ever get to have sex!
Daughter: Mom! EW! GROSS!!
Father: Oh dear.
Mother: Well, it's true, that's why you and your brother need to move out. But NO! You're always upstairs watching TV or Facetiming your friends in the living room, just being all loud until all times of the evening.
Daughter: Well, all you have to do is tell me 'Hey go stay at a friend's house' and I'll split, no problem!
Mother: FOUR MONTHS! I haven't gotten any in four MONTHS!
Daughter (clapping hands to her ears): Oh, my GAWD! I'm living in Schitt's Creek!
Father (to himself): Hasn't been four months for me.