Lucky Moran: Hey, Verble! Are you still taking songs for your ultimate Christmas album?
Verble: Niall, my fine sir, Christmas is a daily state of mind at the Z&T Acoustic Cafe. Whaddaya got?
Lucky: Well, I heard this on my leftie liberal pinko progressive radio station the other day, and as ashamed as it makes me to say, it just took me back to my ute.
John Steppenwolf: Your "ute" ?
Lucky: Yeah, my sordid ute, only my uncle's third wife didn't smoke Salem lights. She thought she was classy because she chainsmoked Virginia Slims.
Niall Carter (after a pause): That's not classy?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P37xPiRz1sg
Mom got drunk and Dad got drunk at our Christmas party
We were drinking champagne punch and homemade eggnog
Little sister brought her new boyfriend
He was a Mexican
We didn't know what to think of him until he sang
Feliz Navidad, Feliz Navidad
Brother Ken brought his kids with him
The three from his first wife Lynn
And the two identical twins from his second wife Mary Nell
Of course he brought his new wife Kay
Who talks all about AA
Chain smoking while the stereo plays Noel, Noel
The First Noel
Carve the Turkey
Turn the ball game on
It's margaritas when the eggnog's gone
Send somebody to the Quickpak Store
We need some ice and an extension chord
A can of bean dip and some Diet Rites
A box of Pampers, Marlboro Lights
Halelluja everybody say cheese
Merry Christmas from the family
Fred and Rita drove from Harlingen
I can't remember how I'm kin to them
But when they tried to plug their motor home in
They blew our Christmas lights
Cousin David knew just what went wrong
So we all waited out on our front lawn
He threw the breaker and the lights came on
And we sang Silent Night, Silent Night, Oh Holy Night
Carve the turkey turn the ball game on
It's Bloody Marys
Cause We All Want One!
Send somebody to the Stop 'N Go
We need some celery and a can of fake snow
A bag of lemons and some Diet Sprites
A box of Tampons, some Salem Lights
Halelluja, everybody say cheese
Merry Christmas from the Family
Feliz Navidad!
Mom got drunk and Dad got drunk at our Christmas partyWe were drinking champagne punch and homemade eggnogLittle sister brought her new boyfriendHe was a MexicanWe didn't know what to think of him until he sangFeliz Navidad, Feliz NavidadBrother Ken brought his kids with himThe three from his first wife LynnAnd the two identical twins from his second wife Mary NellOf course he brought his new wife KayWho talks all about AAChain smoking while the stereo plays Noel, NoelThe First NoelCarve the TurkeyTurn the ball game onIt's margaritas when the eggnog's goneSend somebody to the Quickpak StoreWe need some ice and an extension chordA can of bean dip and some Diet RitesA box of Pampers, Marlboro LightsHalelluja everybody say cheeseMerry Christmas from the familyFred and Rita drove from HarlingenI can't remember how I'm kin to themBut when they tried to plug their motor home inThey blew our Christmas lightsCousin David knew just what went wrongSo we all waited out on our front lawnHe threw the breaker and the lights came onAnd we sang Silent Night, Silent Night, Oh Holy NightCarve the turkey turn the ball game onIt's Bloody MarysCause We All Want One!Send somebody to the Stop 'N GoWe need some celery and a can of fake snowA bag of lemons and some Diet SpritesA box of Tampons, some Salem LightsHalelluja, everybody say cheeseMerry Christmas from the FamilyFeliz Navidad!
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