Monday, June 1, 2020

Overheard at Booth 3: NFNE Day 471

Notes From a National Emergency
Day 471

Saturday, May 30, 2020

Agent, reporting to superior: So, yesterday we had a stop at a checkpoint west of Las Cruces.  Strong odor of marijuana emanating from the van.

Superior: Cool.  Any cash?

Agent: $36,000.

Superior: Excellent.  So, did you hand those illegals over to ICE?

Agent: Couldn't.  They were all citizens.

Superior: US Citizens?

Agent: Yes, sir.

Superior: Damn.  Well, did you at least keep the cash?

Agent: No, sir.

Superior: Why the hell not?

Agent: They were blonde white females, sir.

Superior: Karens-in- training?

Agent: Yes sir.

Superior: OK ... and I don't suppose you smoked some with 'em?

Agent: But of course, sir!

Superior: And nothing for me?!

Agent: Sir ... you know we always take care of you.   Got you a dime bag.

Superior: You're the best.

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