Saturday, December 30, 2017

Overheard at Booth 3: Discussing Putin and Navalny

I swear, this month in Russia is like some scene out of Kafka:

Navalny:  I want to run for President.

Putin: You cannot run for President.

Navalny: Why can not I run for President?

Putin: You have criminal charges against you.

Navalny:  For what crime am I being charged?

Putin:  The crime of wanting to run for President.

Overheard at Table 2: Lucky and Otis Discuss Being Men of a Certain Age

Otis: I don't even know why you're even bringing this up.

Lucky:  Well, you know, a guy's gotta cover all bases.

Otis: Well, even so, you won't have THIS base covered.   

Lucky: That's what I'm saying!  If my wife died or left me, I'd never know if a chick was really into me.  I mean, how could I ever be sure?

Otis: If a chick was into you, you can be sure it would be for you.  Chicks who aren't the woman who built a life with a guy are only into a guy if he's good looking or has money.

Lucky:  Right.  Someone they think that can give them security.   And even women who helped a guy build his fortune is probably only in it for the money if the guy's not good looking, because that money is also HER money.

Otis: Right.  Which is why it would suck to have to start over, to be sure.

Lucky: But it wouldn't be too hard to tell for both of us.  Because if a chick was into either of us, it would have to be for our personalities, because we ain't rich and neither of us are that good looking any more.

Otis: Speak for yourself, homie.

Friday, December 15, 2017

Overheard at the Counter: Niall Runs in the Rain

Niall walks into the cafĂ© with a grin and a shake of the head.  Walking to the counter, he sees that the Barista is already pulling an espresso for him.   He nods his thanks and says to Lucky Moran, who is sitting nursing a latte, "You would not believe the run I had at lunch the other day!"

"I'm certain I would not," Lucky says.

"It was the day that it suddenly got super-chilly and there was a rain coming down.  Totally invigorating!  Well, I'm running the trails, and back through the enclave, which runs by the manufactured pond for all the ducks, y'see ... and as I'm jogging by the tip of the pond, there are these two ducks sitting there, face to face, like they're talking to each other ..."

Niall then takes a sip from the small white cup.  Smiles at the Barista.   Says to Lucky, "Then, these two ducks turn their heads toward me as I'm walking by, and so I says to them, 'This is just like water off your back, isn't it now?' and you know what they did then?"


"No! They, both of them, turned to face the pond, giving me their backs, and then they just ruffled their rumps!  Poofed their feathers, shaking their butts!"  Niall put the palm of his right hand over the fist of his left, then spread his fingers and shook them wildly.   "That must have be duck-talk for some foul gesture!"

Lucky smiled.  "Maybe that's where we got the phrase 'flipping the bird'."