POLL!

OK, listen up! says Verble to the entire cafe, maybe you guys weren't paying attention to the poll that's going on about "Who's your favourite philosopher?" - well, my Barista here tells me that maybe not everybody is totally familiar with the particular philosophies of these particular philosophers, so I'm gonna give it to you in a nutshell:

Rene Decartes: I think therefore I never vote Republican.
Frederich Nietzche: Nothing matters, and so what if it did?
David Hume: One Think Leads to Another (yes, you can hum that to the tune by The Fixx)
Homer Simpson: Beer - the cause of, and the answer to, all Life's problems!
Fortune Cookie: (on one side) You will make a large fortune (other side) Learn Chinese!
Giuseppe Salinghetti: Eschew Obsfucation!
Socrates: I drank what?

Now! says Verble - go VOTE!